positive thought

Can we create or stop illness through the power of thought? If you were told you had a gene that always led to an illness would you be able to prevent that happening by healing and positive thought. The medical profession is so clear cut about these things you have x therefore you will get y... but I am not so sure.......

STYLE......

I wrote a blog already tonight and then deleted it...it was too negative. True I have had a bad week! but I am trying to not let it drag me under...

thinking about the big idea....went to a friends open house today, which she was holding to sell her stained glass work. The last one I went to about two years ago and her work has come on in leaps and bounds since then. Her work then was good...but now she has developed a style of her own.

It made me wonder about my work...do I have a style of my own??? Maybe I am doing the wrong thing struggling in a college course that seems to sap my creativity...maybe I need to be at home working..giving myself the space and time to find that style. Or maybe I already have one, after all it's hard to be objective about your own work - maybe a style is something that you can't see in your own work. When i say style I don't neccessarily mean theme or repetition (although those things can figure in a style) what I mean is a way of working that is recognisable...it's very hard to define it in words, but if you see a Monet or a Matisse, you know who the work is by even if it is not a piece that you know...it's a quality that their personality stamps on it...the signature of the soul....

Saturday 13th November 2004 - destroy....

Today we went to a jumble sale because I needed to buy some fabric for my textile work. It was interesting - there was a time when I used to go jumbling every week but it just doesn't give me that same thrill anymore. I did get some good fabric though. It was funny when it came to cutting the garments up I felt reluctant to do it - even though that was what I had bought them for. There was some small part of me that was saying no thats a dress you can't destroy it. My rational mind was saying its fom a jumble sale, it cost 20p, it may have ended up on the rag van if you hadn't bought it, it doesn't fit you and anyway it's destined to become part of a work of art.....but it was hard to cut up clothing!

Thursday 11th November 2004 - Music....

Thinking about the Beatles. My boyfriend was talking about watching "A Hard Days Night"and I started thinking about the 1960s. I remeber being really impressed by the "All you need is Love" film when I was younger. I used to really wish that I had had my formative years in the 1960s - there was so much exciting stuff going on then - peace protests, hippies, music festivals, even things like satelite link-ups were new and exciting. The world seemed to be full of possibility. I missed out on punk by a couple of years as well as I was 10 in 1976...

No my formative years were the 1980s and 90s. I was one of Thatcher's children. What did we get, my generation? We got disco, we got gangster rap, we got Salt and Peppa, we got Whitney, Michael and Celine, we got acid house, we got the heavy metal revival, we got brit-pop (which was better), we got initials - KLF, Run DMC, TLC, ABC, we got New Romantics and Bananarama, we got big hair and shoulder pads, Spandau Ballet and Adam and the Ants - we didn't do deep. We got boy bands and girl power, Fatboy Slim and Robbie and Kylie, we got Geri and Britney, we got popstars, soapstars, we got wonderwall and material girl, we got Christina and Ricky, we got grunge, we got shooting and hanging, we got the Austrailians, we got Live Aid and Glastonbury, comebacks and rehab. We got the eighties and nineties, Thatcherism and New Labour - we got the bum deal.....

Tuesday 9th November 2004 - Nostalgia...

Have been listening to Led Zeppelin tonight - I had temporarily forgotton what a great rock band they are. It all started with trying to find "if you leave me now" by Chicago. My son heard it on an advert on tv and was amazed when I told him how old it was!!! I thought that I had it on tape but alas I didn't.... however during the pursuit we started looking at tapes (usually I never play tapes anymore) and found Led Zep remastered so I subjected him to the immigrant song and the battle of evermore.....oh the nostalgia... it almost brings a tear to the eye....

i was also remembering the discos that I used to go to at the Kings Head in thetford when I was younger (won't say how young!). If you can call them discos because I don't remember any disco music being played - it was Status Quo, Steve Hillage, Freebird by Lynyrd Skynrd, Black Sabbath etc... it all seems like a very long time ago.....

Monday 8th November 2004 - Limitations....

Thinking about limitations - are we limited by our circumstances or are we merely limited by our own minds???

I tend to swing between believing one then the other... how do we break out of our old limiting beliefs and thought patterns and free ourselves up to achieve anything?

I think the thing which holds most of us back from taking risks is fear - fear of failure, fear of criticism, fear of putting yourself in a vulnerable or financially insecure position, fear of what if... even fear of success and having to live up to it. I know that fear is something which has held me back....

Low self esteem is the other common limitation just think what a happier world it would be if everyone brought their children up to believe in themselves, to feel loved and supported and brave enough to take risks without feeling they would be letting someone down if they failed.

Saturday November 6th 2004 - wish you hadn't...

Today was one of those days where you wish you hadn't.... you wish you hadn,t got up so late, you wish you hadn't got so much homework to do when you want a day off, you wish you hadn't stayed up so late playing scrabble on the internet etc......

Still going to the cinema tonight and I've just had tea cooked for me so life is ok really.....

Friday November 5th - Halloween and all that....

Bonfire night, halloween what does it all mean???

Halloween is a bit of a community event round here but I can't help wondering whether or not it's a good thing. It's a shame that it takes something with such a "dark" vibe to get people out on the streets having fun.....

Or on the other hand maybe it doesn't matter - people have always liked to scare themselves and each other, before the advent of horror films and computer games people told each other scary ghost stories. So maybe it's ok as long as it is lighthearted and fun.

What does disturb me though is the current trend for young people to be into the dark arts. Walk into any high street book store and you will find a plethora of books on the subject - "how to be a teenage witch", books on Wicca, books of spells (usually all for self gain), and even the little Voodoo kit. VOODOO KIT!!! complete with voodoo doll to stick pins into!

Well as a teenager I had a healthy interest in all things unusual or whacky (as most intelligent teenagers do) and at the age of 12 or 13 my friend and I attempted to make a love spell (which didn't work!!) involving rose petals. But what worries me is the nasty side to the stuff thats around now. You can look at any number of spiritual and self help books and websites that tell us that it is not good to put out negative energy and thoughts - I mean isn't there enough hate and negativity in the world already? We are all so concerned about the effects of violent films and computer games - so why are voodoo dolls ok??

Surely we should be encouraging our kids (as it obviously kids that these things are aimed at) to try and get on with one another, to show each other compassion and understanding, not to take revenge on people who have annoyed or hurt you, and certainly not to do something to deliberately hurt other people. Whether they work or not is not the issue, it's the intent that counts.....
I say love thy neighbours (even if they're bloody noisy)
and turn the other cheek (after all slapped cheeks improve your circulation)....

Rant over!

Thursday November 4th - Fireworks

Tonight we had fireworks in the garden (tomorrow is bonfire night). What a funny tradition it is - when I was young we all knew what it was about but somehow the reasons why it started have become less of a feature over the years. I'm not sure if kids today learn anything about it at school - I shall have to ask my son tomorrow. I used to think it was weird celebrating the saving of parliament - after all it was so long ago. Somehow it all seems more poignant now in these days of war and terrorism.....

My favourite firework - Autumn leaves a beautiful shower of golden and red sparks with tiny blue sparks.

Aaarrrgh - Bush is back......

3rd November 2004 Weds

ART

Have spent the entire day making a collograph plate (thats a template for printing - basically a bit of card with things stuck on it to form a picture) which is more knackering than it sounds.

I am experimenting with a new approach to working - normally I like to dive straight in in a very free and spontaneous way and this time I am being very clear and precise (which is why it took so long) and making preliminary sketches. It's certainly a challenge for me - I am fairly resistant to rules and rigid ways of doing things (maybe it stems the years I lived in a hippy commune). I have always been a bit of a rebel - if someone told me to not to do something as a child I just wouldn't be able to resist doing it. Couple that with an impatience to get to the fun bit where you are actually creating something and getting your hands dirty and you will see that I have a bit of a problem with the traditional route of planning, preliminary skethches, preparation etc. Still challenge is good for the heart and soul and I was surprised to find that there is a certain satisfaction to be had from being so precise about how you work - it just remains to be seen whether the finished prints will look any better than if I had stuck the bits down haphazardly!!

2nd November 2004 (Tuesday)

Well - today is apparently the day of the U.S. presidential elections, so naturally once I had recovered from giving my textile presentation my thoughts turned to politics.....

On Sunday I took my 12 year old son and his two friends trick or treating (for Halloween) around our neighbourhood - it's a real community thing round here - one man answered his door wearing a rather scary latex Tony Blair mask. Who's he meant to be the boys asked one another - after a little discussion they decided that he was George Bush.... an intersesting mistake.... or is there something they're not telling us?

Seriously though I was remembering what a political animal I was when I was younger. I rocked against racism, marched with CND, held hands around Greenham Common, petitioned against public transport cuts, spoke at the labour party conference. In the 80s teenagers were political - now hardly anyone is. Is it really that there is not much difference between one party and another or is that a line fed us by the media and the government to keep us down and stop us trying to change things???

As that wise sage Captain Picard once said "What we need is a kick in our complacency to put us in touch with what is really happening...."

1/11/04

Life can be busy - however there should always be time to bake a banana cake. Think I will patent cake therapy.